There will come a time when your mother or father can no longer care for themselves. As they age, simple things like showering, cooking, and cleaning become difficult and even dangerous. A slip and fall accident can result in broken bones, a brain injury, and death. Also, your loved one can get lonely living alone, resulting in depression.
Assisted and independent living communities are excellent options for your aging parent, but disagreements can prevent your loved one from getting the care they need if everyone isn’t on the same page.
Why Is Your Loved One In Denial?
Even if your aging parent struggles to get things done, they may not want to leave their home. There are a few reasons they deny they need help.
- Pride. Independent people often don’t want to admit they need help because they’re too proud. Your aging parent may not want to admit they need help, despite the fact they’re struggling.
- Embarrassment. Admitting they need help with personal tasks, such as using the bathroom, can be embarrassing for an aging parent. They would rather struggle in silence than admit they need help.
- Fear. A person that has taken care of themselves for decades will be afraid to leave their independence and the home they’ve lived in for years.
Dealing With a Parent In Denial
If your aging parent refuses to admit they need help, getting them to agree to move into an assisted living community in Escondido, CA, can be challenging. The conversation will be difficult, but if you’re prepared, the conversation could be productive, and the following tips can help.
- Don’t push. If your aging parent gets angry when talking about a senior living community, don’t push too hard. You’re asking your parents to agree to uproot their entire life, and it may take more than one conversation to get them on board.
- Discuss your fears. Explain to your loved one that you have noticed they need help. If you discuss why you’re so worried, they may be more willing to listen to what you have to say.
- Discuss their options. When your loved one understands that what you’re suggesting isn’t a nursing home, they may be more willing to listen. Explain that they will still have their own living space in an assisted living community and the freedom to continue doing things they enjoy and still get the medical care they need. You can suggest independent living if your aging parent doesn’t require regular medical care. They will have the freedom they desire without all of the work. They can have their house cleaned and meals prepared and still live their lives the way they choose. When your loved one understands that they can live a full and happy life in a senior care community, they may be more open to the idea.
- Find an ally. Your aging parent may not be receptive if you’re the only person suggesting a senior living community; finding an ally can help. If you can get a sibling, relative, or family friend to speak to them with you to allow them to voice their worry, your parents may be more willing to listen.
Dealing With Siblings In Denial
Getting your parents to agree to an assisted or independent living community can be challenging if your siblings don’t agree. In some cases, they’ll be in denial and won’t want to admit that their aging parent needs help. They could also be afraid to go against your aging parents’ wishes and take their side. Finances are another possible reason why your sibling isn’t on your side. They may not want to move your aging parent to a senior community if they fear it will cost too much or affect their inheritance.
Fortunately, there are a few ways to get a sibling in denial on board.
- Discuss your fears. Explain to your sibling why you feel your aging parent should be in a senior living community. Talk about things that led you to this conclusion, such as past injuries, loneliness, and depression. If your sibling understands the past issues and the potential for further, more severe problems, they may get on board.
- Discuss finances. The financial aspect can be more challenging to get past. Before beginning the conversation, research local communities to find out the cost, if they accept insurance, and if any programs or financial help are available. When your sibling fully understands the cost and their share of the responsibility, it may be easier to get them on your side.
When searching for communities that provide care for seniors, check out Cypress Court. We offer both assisted and independent living, with plenty of amenities, including:
- Restaurant style dining
- Social and recreational events
- Weekly housekeeping and laundry service
- Fitness center
- Computer center
- Movie theater
- Beauty salon
- 24-hour response system
- Medical care if needed
When your aging parent is with us, you can be sure they’re in excellent hands. To schedule an appointment for a tour of our community, give us a call today.